Synopsis               

The book starts by acknowledging the difficulty in believing the content, when all the usual experience of life, for the majority of people, suggests that it is highly improbable. Following an admission that if I was presented with the situation prior to diagnosis at the age of 29, I would not have believed it possible, the introduction describes difficulties with medication and experience with psychiatrists. The message finishing the chapter is; even for the sceptical, it’s a thought provoking and entertaining read.

Chapter one describes the catalyst for the first episode. High levels of stress brought about by difficulties in work, possible redundancies, and the advent of a first child. The actual stress levels and the perceived stress levels added up to a disastrous mix, leading to a state of mind were I believed my thoughts were transparent to everybody and I was being oppressed and controlled by unknown people who had always known this to be the case.

The following eight chapters detail the physical events that occurred around each psychotic episode, embellished by my most memorable recollections of what was going through my mind at the time. My thoughts were, as far as I was concerned, real time conversations with familiar people which guided my interaction with friends, family and people in general. The underlying theme being: I had been prevented from learning the truth about telepathic communication and had suddenly been awoken to the reality at the age of 29. I was from a long line of ancient people that used their mind and also, reflex survival skills, in circumstances of confrontation, to calm and entertain the local population and keep the peace. I was indeed a loose cannon, walking the streets, waking up people who had been similarly oppressed. The police were the keepers of the modern state of mind control, so I was in constant surveillance.

During this time, in my mind, I spoke with the stars of television, learnt the ancient ways of my forefathers, found God, smelt, saw and tasted things that were not physically there, frightened neighbours and friends. The impact was far reaching, I was arrested on a number of occasions, appeared before the County Court where I sang a Beatles song without ever addressing the court, was banned from my gym, my guitar club and the local Asda store.

The Conclusion tries to make sense of my experience. The book closes with a section of poetry, written in 2005, whilst recovering in hospital and still experiencing involuntary thoughts.